Lessons Learned: Ft. Eustis AGM

1. When offered road-head by your significant other, don’t respond with, “I can’t, I’m driving” even if you can’t trust your own driving to keep you on the road.
2. Leaving the shower curtain open to make sure that someone can’t sneak up on you to pour cold water on you doesn’t work when the person can easily throw cold water on you from another room. Lock the door instead.
3. John Taylor’s window for performing sock-dressed d*ck tricks is getting shorter since Barcode’s grandbaby is growing. In the future, the socks may be too large for his d*ck.
4. Even Cheffy does not have plausible cause to reserve a king waterbed room with his male virgin.
5. If the Moose lodge waitress is only allowed to pour one shot at a time into your wooden mug, provide her with multiple vessels to pour shots into, as a single shot will not make an adequate mixed drink in a 32 oz vessel.
6. Tippy cup is a game that requires easy access to a puke repository. If the restrooms are not easily accessible or if your significant other refuses to go outside while it is snowing to hold your hair, do not play.
7. Don’t be surprised that your room gets invaded when you reserve one of the 3 hotel rooms available with a hot tub.
8. Two naked hot chicks in a tub are appealing until someone mentions that they are related.
9. Young men (anyone under 40) need to watch out for cougars lounging naked in hot tubs and random beds.
10. If items disappear out of your room, always blame the Trash. Especially when some room keys are skeleton keys for other rooms.

3rd Time’s a Charm

So, I’m doing it again – I will continue playing a role on Everyday is Wednesday’s mis-management. This time, though, I will no longer be taking attendance as hash cash; instead, I will be the hash bookkeeper (aka OnSec). It won’t be a far departure from what I have done over the last 2 years as I will continue to be a familiar face at beginning sign-in and busting the late-cummers at the end circle. However, I will have a greater planning role in coordinating events and such since I will have to determine the budget and pay the bills. I’m sure it will suit me immensely since planning is what pays my bills every month.

Herndon Commute

So I have learned that the commute isn’t too bad (in the morning), but can be horrendous in the afternoon. As long as I avoid the Connecticut Ave exit in the morning and avoid I-270 at all times during rush hour, the commute in the morning can be a bearable 45-50 minutes long. My odds improve when I minimize my time traveling on the Beltway, though.

I have discovered the alternative pathways of Seven Locks Rd, Old Georgetown Pike, and Beach Drive. I have also learned to avoid Norbeck Road and Randolph Road at all times of the day since they are primary east-west corridors. As long as the road goes north-south, the traffic flow is much faster.

I am definitely that kind of driver that will jump off the Interstate looking for an alternative route rather than sit in bumper-to-bumper traffic (which is how I discovered Seven Locks Road).

Of course, finding a way not to return home during rush hour is also a good plan, which is why I will probably be hashing more with SH*T in the upcoming months, as their territory coincides with my new project location.

Chores: Doing Dishes

As you may or may not be aware, @ss Spelunker moved in with me right before New Year’s. Of course, one of my conditions for providing him reduced rent is that he is required to do household chores. Believe it or not, I am a very good (but lazy) cook.

I had not cooked a proper meal in about 4 years because I didn’t feel that cooking for myself was a worthwhile use of my time. However, now that I’m not traveling 3-plus hours one way to whatever weekend destination I have chosen, I have re-evaluated this choice. As a result, I have informed Mr. Spelunker that if I cook all the meals, he must do all the dishes.

He doesn’t see it that way, though. Even though it could take me 1 ½ hours to cook a meal, he feels that doing dishes daily when he did not dirty the dishes and I did not cook that day is not required. I disagree. I have a dishwasher and 90% of my dishes can simply be placed in the dishwasher. So, at most, he spends 15 – 20 minutes per day doing dishes, while I spend at least 3-4 hours per week cooking.

So who is the lazy one here?

So far, my responses to this question have been cleanly split along gender lines – the girls think I am right and the guys think Spelunker is right. Jeez! Men and women will never agree!

New Project Location

Well, my 2-year sojourn in Bethesda has come to an end. The budget disappeared on the project I have been assigned to, and although I have been offered the prospect of transferring to a different department to perform budget tracking and analysis through March, I prefer to make a clean break now.

Fortunately, I am not required to stay on the bench twiddling my thumbs for long – I have been assigned to a rather interesting telecom implementation project in Herndon, VA. Uggghhh! Herndon??? I live 35 miles and across the dreaded Potomac River from Herndon. This will not be a pleasant drive. The good news is that I will be working under the direct supervision of a senior manager (before I was doing staff aug work and had no supervision), so a promotion might be in sight in the next 6 months. Hopefully, I will not have to drive to Herndon for the next 2 years….