Moving Day!

What a day! Lots of plans today - let's see how much of my schedule I can adhere to.... I'm scouting a trail, helping OFE and Udder to move, and going to try to attend two different Halloween parties.

Porn to Fail picks me and Nasty When Wet up to auto-hash our trail for Tuesday. When we pick Nasty When Wet up outside her apartment building, we spy Shamrock, one of the other hares, in the dog park next to Nasty's building. Why isn't she joining us? Cause she scouted last week. Oooh....ain't she special?

I yell out the car window "Shamrock, you suck!"

Obnoxious, aren't I?

I didn't plan well, though. I'm wearing shorts. What's up with that? It's 60 degrees outside - pretty damn cold for shorts. At least I have my white furry hat! I'm going to be a virgin hare. It doesn't seem that complicated and I'm pretty good with directions. We'll see what everyone else thinks on Tuesday.

At the rate everything is going this morning, I'm not surprised that I arrive late for OFE's and Udder's moving party. I didn't miss much though. I immediately put my slave collar on cause OFE doesn't waste any time in ordering me around (gotta protest somehow! hee hee!). First, he tells me to make up boxes. I can't figure it out and ask Udder to help me. Believe me! These are not normal boxes - there is a reason I fail the box-making test! OFE is disappointed by my failure and pulls me off box-making and commands me to put DVDs and Playstation games in the boxes. This I CAN handle! No problemo!


I volunteer my SUV for moving some of the larger pieces of furniture and Doucheberg is incredulous.

He asks me "You can ACTUALLY drive?"
"I've got more licenses than you! CDL Class B and a motorcycle license."

Regardless, he rags on me all day about my driving. Dude! Girls are capable of driving too! And I drive stick, to boot!

Since we're experiencing a box shortage, I volunteer to stay behind and unpack boxes. Where to begin? Who do all these drinking glasses belong to? There's no way y'all can use all these glasses on a regular basis! I fill up an entire cabinet. I haven't even gotten to the plates yet!

OFE promised us pizza, but gets KFC instead. Yummy!! Much better than pizza!

How easy it is to get distracted! Comcast arrives while the moving crew is unpacking and turns on the cable. Recipe for disaster! There goes all productivity. I sit down to watch Hellboy. That does it! I've totally missed the MBA Halloween party - it's in Springfield - so out of my way!

No matter! Sh*t You Gay's party is a blast! First thing I do upon arriving? Apple pie shots! I jump in the barber's chair, tilt my head back and let the pouring begin! Uh oh! I sit up without closing my mouth properly and some of my shot dribbles out of my mouth.

Rodeo tells me "We now know you're a spitter not a swallower."

Hey! No fair! I didn't know what to do! Lemme try that again! Two shots later, I'm a pro! You can't say I don't learn quick!